March 26, 2017
by Nerisha Kemraj
Tears spilled into the Moroccan tea that sat in front of her. With a shift of her hands she casted it aside as the minty fumes that usually tempted her wafted all around. Staring at the picture on the wall, she wished she was on that boat sailing into the sunset on a romantic getaway. But now there was no chance of that happening, not with her cheating ex. Her heart held no space for their tainted love. How could he do that to her? Was she not enough. A painful stab in her heart gave way to a whimper that escaped her lips. Looking around hastily, she was glad it went unnoticed.
Dining alone was new to her. She had always been jn the company of friends or family, but mostly HIM. Everything led to him. Why? Her heart ached.
Flashes of that day came flooding back to her as she played with the candle wax that fell onto the intricate genie-lamp candle-holder that centred the anytique table ahe sat at.
They had been together for eight years. But on that day he was a stranger. He had told her he was busy that weekend. Working late he said. And then she saw him with her. Holding hands, then leaning over and kissing her so passionately. She knew then that it was finally over. Those months of coming home late, while she waited up for him. Those secret phonecalls – all “work related” but at odd times in the night. She saw the signs and chose to ignore them.
What did she lack? She wondered painfully. Where did it all go wrong? What could have been done to change things? She realised there wasn’t anything. A firm believer in fate, she knew that if it was written, it would be. Communication cannot be forced. Their relationship lacked this.
She remembered his disinterest every evening. Head buried in his phone while she looked longingly at him. Not a glance in her direction, even whilst they ate.
Her heart was broken and now she still felt incomplete. The confrontation was brutal. He lied, manipulating every bit of the truth. Until she showed him the pictures. Then he played the victim. How she didn’t care enough anymore, how she took him for granted.
“You don’t put in an effort anymore.” He said. There’s no attraction between us. We need some space apart.”
“You could have talked to me. There was no need to cheat!” She couldn’t hold back the tears then. Neither could she now.
How could she have been reduced to this? But she knew, leaving had been the right choice. Through her sadness she smiled with satisfaction knowing that his new love interest had left him for someone more entitled. So he knew what betrayal felt like too, but it wouldn’t make a difference to someone as superficial as he had turned out to be.
So here she was, alive on this beautiful island, faraway from him. Starting afresh would be a definite way to keep her occupied. Thankfully the job came through, and although she would miss her family, holidays would come around soon enough. Feeling better, she looks at her tea, now cold. Ordering another to go as she paid the bill, a heart full of positivity.